Dead or Alive

What did you find in the bottom of the bottle
How many demons to release
Poured you a drink and then poured for you another
One way to get a little peace
What did you want when you told me you were leaving
I watched you falling out the door
Did you believe I would lose myself in grieving
I felt like I'd been through the war
You're so unkind on the days that you are drinking
How many days are in a week
Alcohol won but the friend got lost I'm thinking
Help wasn't something you would seek
Everyone knows never trust an alcoholic
They only want another glass
Hatred you'd spew after being melancholic
Thank you I will not kiss your arse
Nothing is found in the bottom of the bottle
Saving the pain on which your heartache seems thrive
Drinking is one way to numb the pain of hurting
Dead drunk but feel you're still alive

Conscious Beam

So many are not happy with their lot
This life on darkened roads you did not choose
Bemoaning everything that you are not
Will drive you a place where you will lose
Its good to make some changes, take control
Just look within and if by chance you find
That you are not too happy with your soul
Then search until your psyche's realigned
For what you seek is concrete, not a dream
It lives within if you decide to see
So make your inner eye a conscious beam
A torch along the path to who you'll be
And don't give up when frightened and alone
The light of love you shine will guide you home

The Grim Reaper

You think I am responsible
I'm not
The flesh upon my weary bones
May rot
My putrid life is festering
Like sores
So you think I have no values and
No mores
Despising is the easiest
To do
For understanding needs the will
From you
And no man would invest his time
You see
But destiny has played a trick
On me
For I was once a someone in
These parts
But once the rumours spread we close
Our hearts
A man who's labelled does not have
A choice
They cast you off and take away
Your voice
And being out there's no way back
You know
And I have reaped what other men
Did sow

…to be

Try to be more social
Mix with different friends
You should just get out more
Know how this one ends

People can be complex
Harsh and unrefined
So my usual reflex
Meetings strictly timed

You can have an hour
You, a little more
Keep you a distance
Tally up the score

Everyday I must see
One or sometimes two
Then I can get on with
What I like to do

People make me tired
Like to be alone
When your time's expired
I will wander home

Life is on the spectrum
Socialising's fraught
With a few controls though
Life is as it ought…

Words

If all the writing stopped
And all the reading ceased
My brain would end up popped
For words are my release

If I was still with you
I wouldn't be right here
But I have things to do
That you would not allow

And fame I do not need
My audience is one
I think that I succeed
If I have had some fun

And if my fame is found
Remember what you said
Why must you write things down
Just keep them in your head

Watered Silk

Scraps of disappointment in the tree
The warp and weft is hanging now in shreds
The fabric that was wrapped and made us we
Is nothing more than many broken threads
I brought my needle why don't you have yours
Repairing what we have a task to share
But you disdain my craft and thus my mores
And you would leave our life just dangling there
So I will weave a different tale alone
The warming red replaced with silver chill
For loving you has ultimately shown
The beating hearts to easily are still
My solitary silk is watered tears
My comfort cold to come in lonely years

Not Everyday

Every day he's walking on his own
Every day he's always by himself
Every day he's stepping out from home
Every day he's not yet on the shelf
Every day he's smiling as he walks
Every day he's looking all about
Every day he's silent never talks
Every day he's happy to be out
If one day he didn't reappear
If one day he didn't smile at you
If one day you'll wish he was still here
Let this be the day for something new
Everyday you're walking by his side
Every day a conversation new
Every day your routines coincide
Every day's less lonely when there's two